negotiating the knife’s edge

last night thinking about writing
that’s the word that came to mind
and nearly captivated

almost an obsession
but not quite
the days run fast
and the nights are thick
thick with blurry eyes and false dreams
there’s rarely any satisfaction
but there’s always distraction
binding will
with hollow entertainment
and dreams of dubious conquest
yellow ghosts hide in quiet corners

finally we succumb
to the sanity of restless sleep
and this anticipated sleep
comes easily enough
but often refuses to stay
as we are roused
for a labored piss
and one more erected cigarette

water and wine
dreams of a secular jail
smoke breaks
and the anxiety of another broken reality
one more trial, one more day

if your lucky
time moves slower
and the coffee isn’t burned
one more dying bet
humanity vs artificial intelligence
blue light gives way
to a natural reprieve
breathe, then comes the sun
hazy and yellow
welcoming and constant

maybe the myth will manifest
a certain figure
and this concrete game
will reveal
honest incantations
maybe green visions
will form purple mysteries

the grand goddess waits
and time is fleeting
fleeting and persistent
but sometimes on mornings like this
it’s all just an illusion
love without light
illusions keep us grounded
grounded and captured

where have all the birds gone?
i miss their songs
songs of anarchy
and songs of a blissful apocalypse
i have everything and i have nothing
circles and squares
triangles and distant points of light
seeking lost souls
as skinny breaths
remember forgotten flesh

gods of creation and gods of destruction
manifest robots and revolutionaries
and sitting here
i have words
words without meaning
stories unfinished
living in phases
of art and autonomy
living within a single breath
a breath that whispers truth
and one solitary word



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