sometimes defeat is
waking up in the same bed
every morning
at 6am

hungover

sometimes defeat is
trying to roll cheap cigarettes
that are too damp
to comply

frustrated

sometimes defeat is
sitting at the computer
unable to write
what’s trapped inside

empty

sometimes defeat is
scrambling to get outthe door
to another pointless day
of work

late

we don’t always see the battle
but we rarely feel
the thrill

today none of those things happened
so i guess
this is what victory
feels like