{"id":3965,"date":"2021-09-16T09:06:24","date_gmt":"2021-09-16T13:06:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/?p=3965"},"modified":"2021-09-16T09:06:24","modified_gmt":"2021-09-16T13:06:24","slug":"morning-pages","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/2021\/09\/16\/morning-pages\/","title":{"rendered":"morning pages"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>sigh, it&#8217;s cloudy out<br \/>\nand my new reality<br \/>\nhas yet to breach the dawn<br \/>\ntoday is not so good i think<br \/>\ni feel off<br \/>\nlike i haven&#8217;t wiped the crud from my eyes<br \/>\nno birds this morning, it feels like a bad omen<br \/>\nit hasn&#8217;t even been a week<br \/>\nand yet i already feel washed out<br \/>\ni&#8217;m not yet destroyed though<br \/>\nthere are pages yet to be re-written<br \/>\nand i know death has to come first (death of the ego)<br \/>\notherwise there can be no resurrection<br \/>\nthe cards are very clear<br \/>\nrebirth she said that&#8217;s the ticket<br \/>\nsometimes it feels like this is just another lie<br \/>\nbut something in me says<br \/>\n&#8220;no tears please, there&#8217;s still hope&#8221;<br \/>\nthough i know old habits always die hard<br \/>\nand the path of survival is often lonely<br \/>\nand littered with many distractions<\/p>\n<p>dammit i shouldn&#8217;t read bukowski&#8217;s early works<br \/>\nfirst thing in the morning<br \/>\nthese grim prophecies are just too easy to swallow<br \/>\nit&#8217;s still warm out though<br \/>\nwarm enough to sit on my front steps<br \/>\nshirtless, big bare belly exposed<br \/>\nto all the passing worker ants<br \/>\nas they pretend to ignore<br \/>\nthis oddity by the side of the road<br \/>\nmost days i&#8217;m happy i&#8217;m not one of them<br \/>\ni guess i should feel lucky<br \/>\nsome folks spend lifetimes searching<br \/>\nbut do they know what they&#8217;re searching for?<br \/>\nhappiness is inconsistent<br \/>\nthat&#8217;s the truth we so often refuse to see<br \/>\nand misdirection is the magician&#8217;s trick<br \/>\ni forget this sometimes<br \/>\nbut i&#8217;m always reminded (by the other guy)<br \/>\nthat this temporary misery<br \/>\nis just another self-imposed fate<br \/>\ni can deal with all that<br \/>\nthe real hell isn&#8217;t failure<br \/>\nit&#8217;s being so consumed by the matrix<br \/>\nthat you&#8217;ve nothing to say<br \/>\na state of soft irrelevance<br \/>\nwhen the word just won&#8217;t come<br \/>\nthat&#8217;s true suffering<br \/>\nso i guess it&#8217;s good to compose<br \/>\nthese morning pages<br \/>\nit&#8217;s good to talk to you<br \/>\neven if you&#8217;re not really here<br \/>\nit may not be poetry<br \/>\nbut it&#8217;s a sign<br \/>\nthat i&#8217;m still alive<\/p>\n<p>as i finish writing this<br \/>\nthe sun is starting to break through<br \/>\nthe wet, empty morning haze<br \/>\nthe gods, impotent as they may be<br \/>\nare sending a sign<br \/>\nso you see my friend<br \/>\nit&#8217;s like i said earlier<br \/>\nthere&#8217;s still hope<br \/>\n<a href=\"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/551-morning-pages-.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/551-morning-pages--218x300.jpg\" alt=\"551-morning-pages\" width=\"218\" height=\"300\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-3974\" srcset=\"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/551-morning-pages--218x300.jpg 218w, https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/551-morning-pages--145x200.jpg 145w, https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/551-morning-pages-.jpg 558w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 218px) 100vw, 218px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3965","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poems"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3965","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3965"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3965\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3975,"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3965\/revisions\/3975"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3965"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3965"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poeticexorcisms.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3965"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}